letting go, beginning and diving in

my little red box

I have a bad habit of starting projects and abandoning them midway through. Usually it is not because I have become bored with the project, but more because I have run out of time to give to it. There are only so many hours in the day and up until recently I have not been able to spend a lot of time working on the things that I ‘want’ to do. Instead, I have been doing things for others (which I don’t regret at all) and the normal “stuff that I must do” eats away at the bulk of my time. However, with some recent significant changes in my life, I am making more time for myself. Some of that might be enforced due to health reasons, but it is almost entirely by choice.
One of the “projects” I will be returning to is writing. I have all but abandoned it in recent years. I didn’t realize just how much of it I had given up until I decided to go through my old writing and archive it all. Aside from discovering that I have a ridiculous amount of writing that is sitting unedited in the files (ie. 371 stories and 4422 pages… whaaat!?), I could see quite clearly when I basically stopped writing regularly. The stories stopped being written, poetry came in dribs and drabs and I let the dam become blocked by what was going on in my life at the time. It’s ok that it did. In many ways it was very necessary to do that but I am ready to get back to it. I have been ready for a while, but realistically it was not possible until well, today. So here I am.
The process of moving to a different city, letting go physically of a great many things (including all of my old artwork) and clearing the slate for a new chapter in my life (har har) I am ready to begin again. It might not end up being very frequent in the short term, because there is a possibility that I will be heading into hospital fairly soon, but regardless, I am mentally there, writing.
One of the exercises that I used to do with my writing group before was to write a page a day, or what we used to call a five day writing retreat. I want to get back to doing that again. It can be a very fun and insightful exercise. I have always been amazed by what can come up while doing a five day writing retreat…. And today will be the first day that I dive in. Wish me luck!

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4 thoughts on “letting go, beginning and diving in

  1. I do keep your writes till I have some quiet times to read and ponder over your thoughts and situations….as I am just as human as you in the emotions our different daily situations create for us….I find echoes in your writings….a quiet appreciation of acknowledgement .

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      1. I do feel a resonance with yours/the few others that I follow and such writings are like the magic of leaves blown by the wind and falling in front of me…..old fashioned nostalgia I guess….

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      2. I am glad – whatever the reason might be that you feel a resonance. I find that with words sometimes as well – not necessarily my own (because I am a harsh critic) but definitely of others. I will keep writing and see where it all takes me in this life, because I made a promise to a yester-self that I would. 🙂

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