resting on asphalt

red umbrella

resting on asphalt
after the rain has fallen
you asked me to be patient
to wait and I did
even now I search for forgiveness
the smallest apology to give
myself
for wasting a year and more on you
lies that twisted the earth
beneath my feet
and turned the sky
so that I cannot watch the stars
the red reminds me
spilled out like blood
on the driveway
there is strength in failure
there are gifts
in the cracks and forgotten fissures
if I am willing to let go
of the boiling words
that could not be spoken
not then and left me blistered
I am not there
I am not here
I am lost in the curved belly
of another raindrop
waiting to fall
~

leigh-anne fraser

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