lei fraser

i invited Happiness in today
to sit among the piles of books, magazines
and empty coffee cups
she pushed the clutter
to the floor, a sweeping gesture
to clear enough space
to sit before me
and embrace me as
the sun embraces the earth
with its light
she scolded me then
sternly chastising me
for waiting so long
to open the door
tired of always peeking
through the cracks
and whispering through
the open windows
she pulled out the chaise lounge
set it out beneath the broad arms
of the oak
and sat waiting for me
to get it together enough
to release
the door latch
~

frost dances on fallen leaves
morning sun shimmers
in each icy reflection
bluest sky bows
in joyful reverie
~

wind gathers through my fingers
i hear its ancient melody
as the river passes the shore
shaping the sand endlessly
each wave a breath
each ripple the stone’s gift
each moment slips away
with each rolling water lift
sunlight across my palm
day’s sweet stolen kiss
evening’s rapture through the leaves
moonlight’s bliss
wrapped in this blanket
between here and now
in this silence i breathe again
as the reeds along the river bow
~

what of this laden head
that lies pressed against the glass
screaming mind, howling against
the chains, the bonds
that hold it in place
what of this peace
that it fumbles to grasp
and lay hold to, so elusive
only the minnows flashing
in perfect harmony
in late afternoon sun
can truly know its essence
or the sparrow’s seamless flight
each feather constant with the next
yet here i sit revolting against
what i claim i cannot know
and yet i am here, here i am

~

the day has left only
folded wings and bowed heads
waves have fallen in slumber
as quiet as the shore
footsteps have filled
the autumn night air
crush of stone on stone
soft cool pad of sand
silence comes to embrace me
brush the hair from my eyes
to look deeply within
holding me
as the dragon holds the white orchid
and releases me home
to see the moon’s watery face

~

twilight trips through the window
with sprawling grace
silence, sitting with me
catches the light as it passes
and scatters it with a careless hand
out along the wall and table’s edge
transparent mandala drifting
capture me, hold me still
not by chance, am i here
to watch this timeless union
of shadow and light
dance its way across my room,
my furniture, my body, my life
and erase itself like the gentle sweep
of fine sand after
the circle is complete
drawn closer in the fading light
by my quiet companion
while the wind reminds me
of the cold winter night to come
not even the scattered starlight
and soft candle light glow
can help me discern
where my hand ends
and darkness begins

~

under glass
finger traces
this slow, loping curve
to press this fragile limit
with my palm
i wondered,
in my longing
to shatter this glass dome
if i have over looked
freedom’s responsibility
arranging a crushed rose
so the sunlight won’t
fade the coloured silk,
neatly creasing folds
to preserve the petals’ form
having forgotten the material illusion
that reveals a dying flower
desperate for water
~

This day lies, rolled in darkness now
The cool night air slips through the window…
I should probably shut it
But don’t
The chill on my skin keeps me alert
Or at least gives me the comforting illusion that I am
The light from the candle is warm
My hand seems soft and unscarred
I smile knowing another illusion lies
And I think how can this be that I want to sit here
Wait for the phone to ring or a letter to arrive at the door
While you have gone again
The time will pass as it always does
No alteration to it will come
It cannot be stopped, not even with sleep
The dream will stay for only as long as my eyes close
And I know this with the heart
Whole and unbroken
Soon this deep night will leave itself
To let the sun rise once again into the endless sky
The wind will continue to blow,
Every living thing will draw breath as it has before
And I, I will watch the steam from my tea
Rise
~

Now this heart is home
As you tell all you think you know
What can I do?
It’s the choice you made
To view the world as you say
I don’t want to be your reflection
Or your helping hand
Only you can know
Where it is you stand
All that you assume
Is the baggage you carry to the room
So if you don’t mind
I will sit quietly here
And listen to the wind unwind
When it has finished I will keep going on
~

when the sky blushes,
the water still as silvered glass
and the stars shine one more time
at their brightest
before the first stretch of dawn
I sit with silence to greet the day
The world still sleeping
And though still gently tucked away
I want only to feel the first warm ray of light
Slip across my palm
Not to hold the light between my fingers,
But to feel its lingering kiss as it passes
There are no words that I have found
Nothing that can compare to
The first breath of day
When the sky is painted with a carefree hand,
The sun lies just beyond the farthest line
And the cool sand a sweet and gentle gift
That reminds me I am alive
~

water drops from my hair
head bent low, watching
silver orbs slip down long strands
to plummet below
each drop a thought
too deep even for tears
their rippled consequence
almost unperceived
in the mass of fragile white
light reflecting upon itself infinitely
stays my gaze
while jasmine hangs
as an aromatic veil
not to obscure
instead a warm, yielding embrace
to hold me still
in the absent cleansing trails my fingers draw
on the extremities and porcelain
the moment slowly drains away
and yet, i feel there is something
just arriving
~

river slowly curls
around the stayed stone
as the eagle soars
beyond the highest pines
in this still place
i can hear the breath
you take as though
it was my own
what reason brings us
to meet in this even flow
if only to watch the sun
as it rises and sets on each day
light to pass like a kiss,
a caress, a dream
i rest my head to yours
not daring to ask or reveal
the words spill from your lips
tell me – it’s why i am here
all i can do is join the words together
pearls on a string
and begin
~