I am grateful for being forced to think about what I am grateful for on days, though rare, I do not feel like I have one positive thing to say – grateful for my story and that I am willing to give it up. – grateful for silence and stillness that allows for the space that I need to grow. – grateful for that voice in my head that keeps yapping on because one day I am going to shut it.

Today I am grateful for a funny game that my friend Michelle started on her FB page. It is a take off of the normal “tell me how you met me as a reply to this post”… instead, it asks you to lie about how you first met someone. It turned into  a funny and playful writing game – and I love that. It was quite interesting actually to see how it all played out, and I am currently re-writing a part of my history that never existed in the first place. It’s just awesome. It actually is quite a coincidence because yesterday afternoon the question was asked – are you willing to give up your story? A question that really has gotten me thinking (most of the night and well into today). This playful retelling of how I have met people is tied into that in such a beautiful way, that it has (and will) inspire more stories. I love that.

I am grateful for dreams for the same reason – because of the inspiration that they have given to me in the past for stories that I have written – and also for the subtle insight they can sometimes give as well. Mostly I am just happy to be dreaming again.

I am grateful for patience – I have been a bit short of it lately and I am getting good reminders that it’s time to remember just what patience is all about.

Finally, I am grateful for gifts of flowers, the unexpected and kind gestures of people who continue to take me by surprise this week. Yesterday a woman came into my office – I met her at the art show a couple of weeks ago. We had been chatting about art and framing and she mentioned that she had two silk paintings that her cats had knocked over and broken the glass frame. I offered to frame them in the new frames she had bought, which I did. When she came to pick them up the day before – I wouldn’t take her money. It didn’t cost me anything to frame them – and I just wanted to help her. So yesterday she arrived with a beautiful amaryllis in full bloom. It’s really beautiful. A thank you. It was incredibly sweet of her to think to do that – and totally unnecessary… but I am happy to watch it bloom in the window.
I am grateful for:
1. Imagination and play
2. Dreams
3. Patience when I have none
4. unexpected gifts of flowers

today, I am grateful.

I am now in the ‘habit’ of getting up in the morning and writing down four things that I am grateful for in my life. It suddenly occurred to me this morning that it has been 22 days since I started this (mostly because 22 was staring me back in the face after I typed it out in the title… ) In 8 more days, I am going to be finished this 30 day challenge… I like 30 days. It always feels manageable… and so far it has been. I haven’t woken up and thought, gee I am not grateful for anything more than once. I think there was one day that I wrote about when I thought, no I am not grateful for anything. I was in a dark moment, feeling miserable and sorry for myself. I won’t say without good reason because I did have a good reason, but in keeping with the spirit of the challenge, I thought more about it and did in fact come up with four reasons to be grateful. The thing is – it wouldn’t be a challenge if it all came easily.

Today though, I have no trouble coming up with something to be grateful for. Yesterday morning on my way to work, I stopped in to the local bank to get some money out of the ATM. It was early morning (around 7:20 or so) and the parking lot was empty. I pulled into a space and parked. I was getting out of the car when a man in a pick up suddenly zoomed by in front of me cutting across the parking lot to go out the other exit. I stopped, surprised, and I guess I made a confused face that he saw – because he immediately hit the brakes and started yelling at me for making a face at him. While he was yelling – I started walking quickly to the bank – just trusted my gut that things weren’t right. He kept yelling and ranting about how everyone deserved to live (which I agree with, and for my part, I just wanted to get out a bit of money for coffee without being run over by a lunatic). He asked me one question – what the hell I thought I was doing. I said – parking my car to go to the bank. It was enough to set him off more and he got out of his truck, called me some nasty words and chased me. I said nothing more and I ran into the bank (because there were cameras so if anything happened at least there would be a record of it). He didn’t come in, luckily. He must have left right afterwards, just wanted to scare me. Needless to say, he did. Sometimes, it is just better to run and not engage someone who is clearly got other issues going on that he needs to start freaking out at someone for giving them a look while they did something that seemed to be a danger to me and was…. I will be more careful regardless.

I am grateful to be able to share my photos with people still – I have had several people come up to me following the little show that I did to comment on the photos. One person came and bought a card with a photo of columbine – which he turned into a love letter to his wife. Made me smile a lot to be part of that..

I am grateful that someone – a completely stranger, shared their beautiful creation with me after I featured their work in an Etsy treasury…  http://www.etsy.com/treasury/4d46fe0fe38b8eefb8f0711d/do-you-love-me

I am very grateful to Laure – the earrings are beautiful. I was touched by your kindness. Thank you thank you thank you!

Lastly, I am grateful for finding myself spontaneously dancing to a new song that I had heard for the first time yesterday. I am not a big dancer… in fact I often joke that I dance like a gnome on a donut bender – awkward and rotund. It’s not a pretty site. I did find myself busting a move to a song that I had not heard before… and I just could not help myself. I danced in my kitchen to it – while no one was watching. I realized in that moment – sometimes it is just good to dance and not care who is watching. I dare you to play the song “Waiting for the end” by Linkin Park and not feel the beat. (plus, it is a really cool video!)

~

I am grateful
1. to be able to think quickly on my feet and run when I need to
2. to be able to share the beauty that I see around me
3. for when people unexpectedly share their beauty with me
4. for feeling like dancing when a song came on…and dancing around my kitchen like no one was watching. (No one was, but still… I can’t even remember the last time I felt like that hearing a song.)

today I am grateful for:
1. spontaneous strawberry sundaes in -12C weather
2. moments that make me think and breathe
3. moments that break through walls
4. moments that break down old ideas

today

I am grateful for
1. paint and a blank canvas.
2. neighbours who came to my rescue yesterday
3. waking up to good news
4. poetry

no explanations today, just gratitude

today I am grateful for..
1. putting aside my shy self and jumping into situations that if I listened to my ‘crit eek’ I would never have even dreamed of doing.
2. freaky dreams and having someone willing to listen to them
3. being inspired by a friend  to plan a date night for myself.
4. laughter

On a whim a few months ago, in November (I think) I signed up to compete in the NYC Midnight Short Story competition. I saw a post a friend of mine posted, followed the link and voila, suddenly found myself signed up. I got the email this morning and found out my assigned heat/ topic and I am off and writing now. Whatever happens, I am amazed that I even signed up in the first place. It goes hand in hand with me being asked last week to put some photos in an art show. Rather than think about it, make excuses not to do it, I just did it. It was the very first time that I had done anything like that… I am glad I did. I had nothing to lose in the end, just like with the writing competition. I really wanted to start this year of doing things that I have wanted to do but never had the courage to. So far, I am three for three. My unrulei making is helping.

I have been having some weird and intense dreams lately – and luckily a friend of mine has been willing to listen to me talk about them. I have mixed feelings about interpreting dreams, but regardless, it is nice to have someone to talk to about them.

I also am grateful for another friend (Gen you’re awesome) who has inspired me to plan an ongoing ‘date night’ for myself. I haven’t actually planned it yet but I am going to. 2 hours just for me.

Not sure how I can’t be grateful for laughter. I just am.

Well… today I am grateful for having a living alarm clock. I slept in, didn’t hear my alarm go off once – my daughter luckily came in and woke me up. I also woke up to a beautiful pre-dawn sky and saw a spectacular sunrise this morning on my way to work. It was nice to see the sun – even though it was brief (the clouds have since moved in again).

I am deeply grateful today to some very dear friends of mine, who when I feel like I am stumbling/ crashing/ burning, consistently are there when I reach out for help. I have never been very good about reaching out – have always in the past kept my troubles to myself, but I am learning this year that I just can’t do it alone. I am grateful (so much) for being able to be myself with them. They let me rant, cry, laugh, whatever – and they don’t let me be hard on myself. You are beautiful and you know who you are.

I am grateful for my life. I have two wonderful daughters – who are the reason I am here. I get to help others for a living, be creative and express myself artistically every day. I am healthy. I have a house that protects my family and keeps us warm (now that I fixed the furnace and put weather stripping on the new doors the rental company installed – holy gale force wind!). I have food on the table (not now but you know what I mean). I have a loving family – brothers sisters dad, whom I love deeply. I have some wonderful friends. I have a lot and I am grateful for it all.
1. That Gabbie woke up on her own this morning and then woke me up too
2. More sunshine
3. Deeply grateful for friends – especially when I am having a bad moment and all I need is a hug and to laugh
4. For my life

Today I am grateful for:

1. that there were no ants around me when I woke up from a very weird and disturbing dream.

2. that my driveway was still nicely plowed even though they plowed the streets in the night and boxed in the end of the lane with ice and snow. I couldn’t exactly deal with it because I broke my shovel yesterday and was too lazy to go out and buy a new one. I just drove my car straight through it. I’m a rebel.

3. sunshine. It is currently pouring in the window and after so many days of heavy grey skies, I am just now realizing how much I missed seeing it.

4. that there were no ants around me when i woke up from a very weird and disturbing dream.

today

I am grateful for

1.the wind, rain, sleet and snow (and getting to drive in it). I like to drive a lot, and I love my car because it enjoys the winter as much as I do. I enjoy being able to drive through the worst kind of weather and know that when the idiot in front to of me is taking a sharp turn too quickly and is dangerously close to spinning out into the ditch, I have plenty of time, good winter tires and can stop well out of the way.

2. I am also grateful for my very warm Irish sweater. It is an actual sweater from Ireland proper – all cabled and warm. need I say more?

3. good coffee. hmmm coffee – ground properly, brewed well and staying warm in my travel mug/container/thingy

4. just being.

today I am thankful for:
1. tissue
2. snow tires, winter hat and mitts
3. going fearward
4. sound of snow crunching under my feet.